Barack (Eminem "Stan" Spoof)

OK, OK, I have been a terrible blogger.  Not that I ever was a good blogger.  I just like attention for making delicious food.  Don't fear fans, I have plenty of recipes to put on here when I stop being lazy.  But I did do something that just must be shared right now.  

My friend Rafal wrote this brilliant "letter" to Obama as a parody to Eminem's song/video "Stan".  I told him it was genius and that we needed to make a real video.  So I came up with a refrain, we updated the rap (well, he did), and his very talented brother filmed it.  So here are the lyrics and the video. 

Happy voting! 


Tea Party's cold, I'm wondering why I 
Bother to vote at all 
November 6 is leering closer 
And I can't see at all 
And even if I could it would all be blue
Watch debates and read the news 
It reminds me that no matter who, 
The nation's screwed 

Dear Barack,

I wrote you but you still aren't callin'

I left my cell, my Facebook

And a G8 picture at the bottom

I sent my letters back in autumn

You must not have got 'em

There probably was a problem with the White House firewall or something

Sometimes my emails get passed thru Secret Service after I jot 'em

But anyways - forget it

What's been up, how's the Attorney General?

My interest is in law too


I'm about to be a lawyer


When I get my law degree, guess I’m going to be called?


MC J.D.

I read about your birth certificate drama too, I'm sorry

I had a friend whose ID got him booted from a bar


That didn't want him

I know you probably hear this everyday


But I'm your biggest advocate

I even got a copy of the bill you passed in the Senate

I got a room full of Hope! campaign posters

I like the commercial you did with Biden too

Your ads were informative!

Anyways, I hope you get this Prez

Hit me back, just to chat

Truly yours, gimme a call

This is Rafal

Dear Michelle,

Obama still hasn't called 

I hope he gets the chance, 

I’m not a mad voter

I just think it's messed up you're the one answering donors

If he didn't want to meet up with me in Chicago,

He didn't have to, but he could’ve signed a veto on a tax or two 


Help the middle class Michelle, or we’ll occupy streets


We’ve been paying off student loans for years now,

And O just says, “No relief”


That's pretty crummy, man – he’s like the leader of the free world


He could give us a hand out, to alleviate a grand or two


I’m not that mad though,

I'm just trying to pay off my school

Remember when we won four years ago

He said “Yes we can!,” I said the same right back


See I'm just like Obama in a way


I'm an overacheiver

We both like the Bulls and DVR Cheaters

I can relate to what he’s saying when he's speaking on TV

So when I have a tough day


I put it on and he speaks to me

Cause I don't really have another candidate


I still dream about '08 and 

I put a bumper sticker with his name all over my license plate


Sometimes I even check to see how much he's in the lead

It's like adrenaline


The polls are such a sudden rush for me

See everything Obama says is real


And I respect him because he tells it


My girlfriend's jealous


'Cause my Barack talk is overzealous 

But she doesn't know his policies like I know his policies Michelle,

No one does


She doesn't know what it’s like


To solve foreign discontent 
with bayonets

Obama's gotta call, Michelle

I represent a big voting contingency you don’t want to lose

Sincerely yours, Ra

P.S. You're pretty cool too 

Dear Mr. I'm-Too-Busy-Presiding-To-Write-Constituents: 

This'll be the last email I ever send the Democrats,


It's bee six letters back from Biden!

I don't deserve this!


I know you got my last two donations;


They hit my credit card perfect

So this is my email I'm sending you, I hope you read it


I'm on lunch right now, I’m typing 90 words per minute!

Hey O, I ate Chik-fil-a, dare me to vote for Mitt?

You know the song by Black Eye Peas, it's their number one hit

about how imma be having a good night boom boom powing 


pumping my humps, when’s everyone gonna realize all their songs sound the same?


That's kinda how this is, you coulda been my Will. I. Am

Now it's too late - I'm like the other guy in the Peas, I'm lousy


And all I wanted was a tax break or a governor recall


I hope you know I took down ALL of your stickers off my cubicle wall


I voted you in Obama, we coulda balled together, think about it


You ruined it now, I hope you can't make a lay up and you freeze about it

And when you freeze on D, I hope Fox News screams about it!

I hope you LOSE and Morgan Freeman does... Bruce Almighty 3

See Prez; [*screaming*] Shut up Jim! I'm tryin to talk!


Hey B, that's Rom-DMC screamin at Jim in the back


But I didn't watch the debate, I Facebooked it

See, I ain't like you

because if I had women in binders, I’d be a happy Mormon too

Well, gotta go, I'm almost done filling my ballot out


Oh damn, I forgot, nothing will change even if I fill this out

Dear Rawful,

I meant to write you sooner but I just been golfin’

Teaching Tiger how to keep his women around, I'm awesome

Look, I'm flattered you believe my re-election's gonna happen


Want an autograph for your brother?

What about Air Force One napkinas?

I'm sorry I didn't see you at the rally,

I must’ve missed you


Don't think I did that intentionally just to diss you


But yea, what's this stuff about rape being a method of conception?


Ryan says that stuff like he’s clownin,

How f’d up is that perception?


That’s like Paul saying he’s Ryan Gosling 


Just because they share names, have notebooks, and use gasoline,

And what's with Mitt buying dress shirts at Costco?


That made Michelle hafta show up at the local Jewel Osco


I really think the Reps and the Dems  and the indies need each other


Maybe we just need to work together better


I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time


before you decide not to vote, I think that we'll be doin just fine


if everyone relaxes a little, I'm glad I inspire you but

Man, 
why is everyone so mad?

Try to understand, we needed our kids in the Afghanistan


I just don't want you to do some crazy stuff

I seen this one piece on YouTube a couple weeks ago that made me barf

Some country was in debt and couldn’t stop borrowing enough

Three kids made a video documenting the giant flustercuck

then my WiFi went out, so I couldn’t get Isreal’s point of view

Come to think about, you know what…

We are all screwed… 
Darn!