Now it shouldn't surprise anyone that I have beef. I'm a total book snob. I dislike almost all books that people make a big fuss about (except in the cases of the Harry Potter series, which was extraordinary by the fifth book; and The Help, which I could not put down). But Twilight's fourth book, Breaking Dawn I think, is the only book I have ever quit reading in my adult life. Literally called a friend with 200 pages left in the entire series and said "What the hell happens in the end of this horrific book because I seriously cannot read another page of this disaster?" I thought Hunger Games was perfectly fine, but no better than just about all other books I've read, which all fall somewhere in the category of "the middle". Five People You Meet in Heaven was cheesy. The Notebook was the sappiest book I've ever forced myself to finish. The DaVinci Code was an excellent page turner, but not life-changing and that was high school so it doesn't count. I rarely finish a full series because I get bored. You get the picture.
Books I enjoy are always those where I am either challenged to a new system of thought, or where I learn something, often about another culture or time period. I read a lot of both nonfiction and fiction. I love classic books because of their universal themes. I like books for many different reasons. I could go on about it forever, but I won't. I will get back to Grey. OK, I went into it expecting most of what I am getting. So I will give it that. And the sex scenes are not overrated. Well done, E.L. James.
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| I mean, it has its moments |
But, why in May of 2011 is the main character of a book, an intelligent college graduate, so computer illiterate? She calls her borrowed Macbook "the machine" as if it's some newfangled creation. She barely knows how to respond to an e-mail and seems surprised when she gets one. She's not from the Sudan. She's from Portland.
Next thing. What is the real likelihood that an attractive graduating college senior, with a lot of friends, a really popular roommate, men who have crushes on her, etc. would not have ever been close to drunk or made out? She refers to only having kissed maybe one or two guys ever. She's not a leper. Come on. And she doesn't have any moral qualms with drinking or hooking up ... she drinks the rest of the book upon meeting Christian. It's just weird.
Also, E.L. James feels the need to re-describe Christian every chapter. I know. He has nice copper hair and you like the way his pants fall on his hips. He's pretty. We get it. Really. Last thing I want to point out is how annoying I find the excessive adjective/adverb use. Case in point "... stumbling once but fortunately not sprawling onto the immaculate sandstone floor. I race for the wide glass doors, and suddenly I'm free in the bracing, cleansing, damp air of Seattle. Raising my face, I welcome the cool, refreshing rain. I close my eyes and take a deep, purifying breath, trying to recover what's left..." (James, 17). Throughout the three sentences in that selection, 13 adjectives or adverbs are used (not counting the usage of prepositional phrases as descriptors, although they are). A very wise professor once gave me some advice. Use adverbs and adjectives only where completely necessary to add emphasis or description. Solid writing is based on the usage of strong verbs and specific nouns.
I'm not trying to suggest that I am some phenomenal writer or that I could have done it better. I've been struggling to write my first novel for six years and it's way too long already. I give James a lot of credit for the imagination that went into many of the scenes and find the overall concept to be interesting. And hey, I'd take however many millions she has now and write just about anything anyone wanted. But I'm halfway through the first book and am definitely not having trouble putting it down.
To be fair, my mom warned me that I'd be critical of the writing.
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